Ryan came out of school today with both of his brand new shoes untied. He managed to ruin the laces on his shoes in just over a week. The little plastic things on the ends are already worn off. Hasn't he learned yet that not even attempting to tie his shoes are at least acknowledging that his laces are dragging the ground is enough to turn me into a cross between Linda Blair and Joan Crawford.

In honor of Holy week Erin rushed to a cingular store to see what could be done about her phone. She called me from the store with a dilemma. A new phone would cost her $250 with a $50 rebate. She has enough money but it would almost clean out her checking account. She will not be getting as many hours at work now that high school soccer season is here. I reminded her that we will be buying her car soon and she will have car insurance and gas to pay for. She said "fine mom, I'm done talking to you, bye,click." I sat there looking at my phone thinking, I'm sure she didn't just hang up on me. I called her back and she didn't answer. It was probably a good thing because I was ready to climb through the phone to wring her neck. When she got home she looked on cingular's website and noticed that my phone is eligible for an upgrade. If I sign another two year contract she can get her phone for $99 and put her Sim card in it and I get to keep my old crappy phone for another two years. Sounds like a great deal to me. Now she is in a good mood. The crazy train has left the station temporarily. I'm sure another train will be back this way any minute.

Lauren is having all four wisdom teeth cut out tomorrow. I took off work on Thursday to take care of her. Erin wants me to take her shopping since I am off. I explained to her that I took off to help Lauren. She said, "all she needs is a remote control, a glass of water and a bottle of Advil." I hope she remembers that when she gets her wisdom teeth out.

Sam went to Mizzou last week to visit a friend. She said they went to a karaoke bar and she sang Jesse's girl. That almost brought a tear to my eye. That gave her favorite kid status for at least a month.

Ryan got a little cabbage plant in a Dixie cup on Friday at school. He went to a friends house to play after school so he brought me the plant and asked me to take care of it because there is a national contest on who's cabbage plant grows the biggest. I am assuming the details were a little sketchy. I didn't even bother looking at the flier that came with the plant. He got home Friday night and asked me "where's my plant?" I had already forgotten about it. It was still in a cup holder in the van. He said "there goes my chance at Harvard." I told him he had a greater chance of getting to Harvard if he started studying for his spelling tests. He has taken great care of his cabbage plant since Friday. I give that plant about 10 days before it shrivels up and dies.

Ryan had a substitute on Friday. He took that opportunity to act like a complete moron. During a video in reading class he met up with a buddy in the coat room for some rough housing and horse play. He received detention for being disrespectful to the sub. They do detention on Wednesday mornings at 6:30. Dave and I will still be finishing up at boot camp. Erin gets the lucky task to bring her baby brother to detention. She suggested that he just walk to school, I am thinking she will be pretty mean to him the whole ride to school. If that is not a fabulous deterrent to behave in school, I don't know what else is. Erin/Sybil scares even me sometimes.

We went to two malls this weekend looking for a confirmation dress for Shannon. She was either too skinny, too pale or her boobs weren't big enough. She must have tried on fifty dresses. We finally found a cute one that was Conservative enough to wear in church. Her class is going on a field trip to the Cathedral next week. She told me tonight that she has nothing to wear. She doesn't have any khaki's and she can't wear jeans. I told her that I was sure she could find something in her closet. Lauren suggested that she wear the navy abercrombie pants that she has. She turned up her nose and said "those are ugly." I told her if she couldn't find anything that Maggie would be happy to lend her the Saint Margaret Mary costume. I think she is going to go ahead and go with the "ugly" pants.

We had a little catastrophe this evening. Erin/Sybil went to Michaels to get supplies to decorate a ring box for a Junior at school. It is a long standing tradition at her high school for a sophomore to decorate a box for the Juniors to put their class ring in that they get on ring day. She got home from the store and realized that she didn't have her phone. She spent $150.00 on the phone a couple of months ago with one of her first couple of pay checks. She asked me if she should get insurance and I told her probably not because the first year was pretty much covered anyway. To make a long story short she called her phone and a man answered. He found it in the parking lot and brought it inside Michael's for her. She came back home looking upset. The phone was broken. Of course it was my fault because I told her not to buy insurance. I figured I had to be to blame somehow. She's the one that dropped it in a parking lot in the rain but somehow it is my fault. She threw a temper tantrum and screamed and yelled for a while. She begged me to call customer service to see what she should do. Lauren and I explained to her that insurance does not cover water damage or a cracked face plate so it wouldn't matter if she had it or not. Now she is blaming the poor girl who's ring box she is making. During all of this lovely chaos, Dave was trying to get ready for bed. Lauren came in and asked if she could take a bath in our bathroom. Dave said "what are you doing? I am getting ready to take a shower." She said "sorry dad I have cramps I need to take a bath." He said "can't you use the bathroom upstairs?" She said, "no the toilet is backed up in that bathroom and someone pooped." Meanwhile Sybil's head was spinning around due to the tragic end of her beloved cell phone. Dave played plumber upstairs for a while and fixed the toilet. I am glad my kid has not gotten too attached to a material object and has totally embraced holy week. So far today I have one kid on track for juvenile detention and another one looks like she is headed to the loony bin. Maybe I should go to the loony bin instead, I might get some rest there.

Kelsey had an 8:00 AM soccer game at a park 40 minutes away. Dave had practice for Ryan's team so I was the lucky one who was supposed to take her. When I woke up I felt like a kid on Christmas morning. It had rained all night so Ryan's practice was canceled and Dave got to take Kelsey while I slept in. The dog had an appointment at the groomers at 9:30 so I couldn't sleep too late. I woke up around 9:00 and noticed that my hair had a strong resemblance to a cockatiel. Erin had borrowed my blow dryer and straightener last night and once again failed to return it. I tried to wet my hair down as best as I could. I didn't want to go upstairs and wake up kids looking for my stuff. I dropped the dog off and went to Pets Mart to get more of the dog pee odor remover solution. I do this at least once a month, I walk through the store filled with pet owners walking around talking to their pets like they are human. I'm just glad that no one tried to sell me a bird since my hair looked so bad.

Kelsey had her first basketball game since she got her contacts. She is so good at stealing the ball and sprinting down the court only to miss lay up after lay up. She was anxious to see how her new contacts would improve her shot. Well now we know that her eyes were not the problem, she still can't make a lay up. But in my opinion, she is the cutest little basketball player on the court!!!