Big Families

My sister sent me this in an email a while back. I just came across it and thought it was worthy to post. I wish I knew who the author was so I could give them props.....Big families are often criticized and raked through the coals by the media. Funny though how children of big families are normally the best behaved and most well rounded in the room, this article helps explain why. It's kind of long but very well written....Enjoy!


A woman said to me recently that my five children were very well behaved.It’s one of the best things I can hear so I thanked her. Then she asked me“how do you do it with so many?” I told her that I don’t think I’d be a very good parent of one child or two. She didn’t believe my answer but honest to goodness, I sometimes think that having many children is easier than just one. Why big families are easier: Patience. I never have toteach patience. My children know that I can’t drop everything for them ifI have a baby in my arms. Work Ethic. My children have learned to workbecause there are always chores to do in a small house packed with littlemessy lunatics. And they all learn quickly that sometimes they have to cleanup a mess even though they didn’t make it. Humility. My children havelearned it’s not always their turn. They’ve accepted they can’t alwaysget their way because other people have to get their way sometimes.They’ve learned that some children are better at certain things than theyare. Foreign language skills. You can learn a lot of Spanish by watching tenyears of Dora the Explorer that you just can’t pick up in two. And nowwith the Diego spin off I’m practically fluent. Laughter. The childrenhave learned to laugh at the insane non sequiturs of younger siblings.They’ve learned that laughing just feels better when seven people aredoing it along with you. Competition. Do I really need to go into this?Everything is a competition in big families. The children compete over whoreads faster, who drinks their milk faster, who gets to the bathroomfirst…etc. Everything is a competition and they’re all keeping score.Balance. The floor of the front room of my home is a minefield of toys andchildhood paraphernalia. Just walking through the room requires great skilland balance. I’m absolutely convinced my two year old will be a favoritefor Gold on the balance beam in the 2016 Olympics. (She might have to layoff the cookies a little but I’ll deal with that later.) Life isn’tfair. Sometimes you just give it to the baby because you want a littlequiet. Not all the time. But sometimes. Just say “No.” Being able to say“no” may be the most undervalued skill in this world. The need to beliked is pervasive. The need to be cool even more so. Having brothers andsisters teaches children to say “no” about 143 times a day. It’s agood skill. Praying. They learn that nothing beats praying together as afamily. Nature/Nurture. Having many children has taught me that nature has alot more to do with who my kids are than nurture. This is helpful,especially when your children misbehave you don’t have to feel bad aboutit. Just say “Stupid nature!!!” and blame your spouse’s genes.Namecalling. You can occasionally call your child by the wrong name andstill not be considered a terrible parent. They know who you mean just fromyour tone. Sometimes if you need something done you can call the wrong nameand someone will still show up. That helps. Spying. My children have learnedthat they can’t get away with anything. I have spies who look a lot likethem who are willing to drop the dime on them for anything. Even at schoolI’ve got a child in just about every grade. If they do something I’llhear. That keeps them nervous. And I like keeping my kids a little nervous.Friendship. The children have many friends. They’ve got girly friends,crying friends, fun loving friends, consoling friends, and crazy friends.And they all have the same last name. And they’ll be there forever foreach other. No matter what. Love. I think my children have learned to lovebecause there are others around them to love and who love them. I honestlycan think of no better way to teach children to love than siblings.