I was having my own little pity party today. Not sure why but aggravated with myself for not still being a size 4. The Steak n Shake I had for lunch didn't help. We had a party to go to tonight but I didn't feel like going. Instead I went to the mall. Note to self, when you feel fat.......Don't under any circumstances go try on clothes. I bought a few new tops and a couple new pairs of pants. I am back in a size 8. I'm hanging on to single digits by a thread. I thought about coming home and running on the treadmill......then I thought about having some ice cream.......then I thought"why would I try and sabotage myself?" it would be so much more sensible to drink a box of wine!!!

As I was leaving the mall, I passed a mom in the parking lot telling her young son, "I had to tell you at least 10 times not to touch anything." I smiled to myself and thought back to the days when I would shop with my little ones. Then I thought, "Great, now I am not only fat but that just reminded me that I am old too."

Kelsey had sectionals for Cross Country today. The top 30 runners move on to state. In addition the top 4 teams also qualify. Kelsey ran her little heart out, she came in 37th and her team came in 5th. She was pretty disappointed. She had a great run and finished with a really good time . Now that Cross Country is over she can focus on the 47 other activities that she has going on.

Shannon even came out to cheer Kelsey on.......or she came so she could get a free lunch, I'm not sure which reason she came. Or it could be because I wouldn't let her stay over at her friends house last night until she promised to show up bright and early at the Cross Country meet.

We survived another parent teacher conference. Ryan's teacher told us that one time last year, several teachers were discussing my son in the teachers lounge and one of them commented. "Ryan Murphy is driving me crazy today." He told us that he responded with, "He was perfectly fine in my class, I haven't had any problems with him." I wonder what would make his teacher think that was a story that I would enjoy hearing. Translation;.........Most of the teachers here think your baby boy is a real pain in the ass but I tolerate him just fine!! I knew early on that I would have a hard time convincing all these teachers that my son is as perfect as his mother thinks he is.


Maggie was another story, her grades were good but her standardized test scores look as if she may have been playing a dot to dot game instead of reading the questions. Good thing she is pretty.

Is it too late to decide to have just 2 children? If so, can I pick which two and do they have to be ones that I have given birth to or can I pick someone elses kids???



Shannon went to get her spray tan last night, she was really torn with making the decision to go during the Cardinal game. She went ahead and went, Skanky Little Mermaid will look so much better with a little golden glow. Who will notice anything other than her half naked body anyway?

Erin called me to see how much money she had in her account, she was headed out for some hair spray paint for her Halloween costume. I didn't even ask what she is going to be, I really don't think I want to know.

We have trunk or treat tonight at school. Game 7 of the World Series is also on. I was perfectly fine with skipping Trunk Or Treat to stay home and watch the game. Game 6 was one for the record books. Apparently school will have the game projected outside for everyone to watch and they will dismiss an hour early. I guess there is no getting out of going now. I will be stopping on my way home from work to unload my paycheck on candy.

Kelsey has sectionals for Cross Country tomorrow morning, I hope the Cardinals win early so I am not a zombie tomorrow at her Cross Country meet. I have had fast food almost every day this week in celebration for completing the half marathon. If I keep this up by the next half marathon in April I can just roll down the whole course instead of running.

We survived another half marathon. I wasn't sure that I would actually run because I hadn't had much time to train. I had started training early this summer but had to take over a month off in September when I had problems with my intestine. The weather was nice so I decided to go for it. My time was less than stellar but I completed the race and ran the majority of it...at a slow pace but I was at least able to run. The picture above is of the family. Maggie was in Memphis for a soccer tournament and Erin was in Alabama borrowing other peoples parents for parent weekend at her college but they were with us in spirit.

Lauren completed her first full Marathon, she looked pretty strong at the finish. When I completed the half I threw up in a trashcan...not one of my better moments. Grandma brought Kelsey and Ryan to watch Lauren finish her race.

When we got home I had 5lbs of dog poop to pick up. When Kelsey and Ryan got home I asked if they even bothered to let the dog out this morning before they left. (Dave and I stayed at a hotel close to the start of the race) They both said, "No we weren't home." Oh, so you woke up in the front lawn?? They said, "No , but grandma rushed us when we woke up.

We got home that day at 4:00 after stopping for something to eat. Grandma never lets the dog out, she has the "It's not my dog attitude." She claims that he won't go outside for her. I'm thinking little effort by all three of them was given to let the dog out...like NONE. I told Kelsey and Ryan that their punishment on Monday was that they are not allowed to use the restroom until 4:00 pm so they can see how the dog felt. (I think they really fear me)

I got an email on our school website from Ryan's religion teacher. It said "Andrew did not use his time wisely in Religion class, he spent his time talking and got nothing done on his project." I responded back, "That's great but who in the hell is Andrew?"

I called Ryan and asked if he got in trouble last week in Religion class, he fessed up. I guess Andrew's mother got the email that Ryan did not use his time wisely. Parent teacher conferences are Friday, I can't wait.

Erin called me upset yesterday because she is having a hard time in school. She is used to getting all A's. Her nursing classes are really tough. She is trying to juggle, sorority life, college soccer and some pretty tough classes. I tried talking her down from the ledge. She kept crying and saying "I don't think I can do this? It is just too hard." The whole time I was talking to her my other line was beeping and my office phone kept ringing. She has a C in anatomy, I told her that she was not flunking and she would be fine. She had just taken a test in Nutrition and felt as if she flunked it and she was completely distraught. I felt really bad for her but needed to end the call because I could tell from the caller ID that it was Shannon who had been calling me frantically. I was ready to put another fire out.

I called her back and Shannon said, "Mom, do you think I should get a spray tan before Halloween?" Seriously....that is why you called 12 times to get my opinion on whether or not your skanky Little Mermaid costume would look better if you had a spray tan?" If you want my opinion, go as a ghost, no need for a spray tan and cover up all your exposed skin with a white sheet!!!

A few hours later Dave called me and said, Erin is trying to get a hold of you. She told me she had a melt down earlier and just got her Nutrition test score back. She thought she flunked it but was actually 1 point away from a B.

WHATEVER!!!

My husband completed a 340 mile race in a kayak down the Missouri river from Kansas City to St. Charles. He started on Tuesday morning the 11th and finished on Thursday the 13th. There was a storm that came through on Wednesday so he had to wait it out and it pushed him behind schedule. he was hoping to finish during daylight hours on Thursday. He finished at 3:30 Am Friday morning.

I woke up the kids and brought them down to the riverfront so they could see him finish. It is a pretty impressive accomplishment. There is no way you would catch me out on that river in a kayak...much less in the black of night with a little battery operated light.


With that said...ok he is is impressive yada, yada, yada. What I can't for the life of me understand is how he can complete a near impossible kayak race and he still can't master ordering his own food???

We went to White Castle Saturday night after our last soccer game. It was just Dave and I, Ryan and Maggie. Of course we went inside...the drive thru stresses Dave out. I had to use the restroom really bad after sitting in the cold at a soccer game.

I ordered our food and the lady was still figuring it out on the register when I said to Dave, "I am going to run to the bathroom before I pee in my pants, order drinks for Ryan and Maggie." He looked at me with sheer panic in his eyes and said, "Please don't leave, I can't do that." I said, "Are you flipping kidding me? You can kayak down a river but ordering two drinks is too difficult?" I left him standing at the counter with a deer in headlights look and went to the bathroom. He did just fine, just like I predicted.


Baby steps....baby steps. I will fix him someday if it's the last thing I do.



Kelsey called me today after school to let me know how mean Shannon is....(I think I already know) Anyway, Kelsey has cross country practice after school and she forgot to bring a sweatshirt. It is really cold out today. She asked Shannon if she could borrow her sweatshirt? Of course Shannon told her no, she has a volleyball game to cheer at tonight. It sometimes gets chilly in the foyer with people coming in and out. She didn't want to get cold. Never mind her little sister running seven or eight miles with the wind in her face.

They make me so proud!!!!

Lauren's 24th birthday was last week. A few days before, I stopped at the mall on my way home from work to pick up a few little extras for her gift. It is unusual for me not to rush home with a million places to be so I naturally enjoyed my leisure time and shopped for a while. I stopped off at the grocery store on my way home to pick up something for dinner.


When I got home, Ryan was asleep in the chair. I woke him up and asked him to help me carry in the groceries. He groggily walked towards me and said, "I can't, I'm stuck in handcuffs." He was in his boxers and nothing else.....other than the handcuffs. I asked him how long he had been like that? He never did give me an answer so I am assuming it had been a while.


Ryan received those handcuffs a while back and was always able to get himself out of them using a bobby pin. When he first got them he entertained himself for weeks, handcuffing himself to poles, treadmills, rungs of chairs etc, anything difficult so he could come away looking like Houdini. Apparently, he lost his touch. Eventually Maggie found the missing key and life was good again. I was thankful that I didn't have to go to my local police station with my naked boy in handcuffs.


Ryan let me know Wednesday morning that he had dress rehearsal for the school play (that I knew nothing about) I asked him what part he was playing and his response is, "I am a "cameo."

I am hoping he meant that he had a small non speaking part and that I didn't need to whip up a costume that resembled a woman's broach?? Why are my perfect children never the star of the play? I have seen more plays where Murphy kids are; towns people, chorus, sheep, trees, wood cutters, umpa loompas, shepherds, dancers and tech support. Cameo is a new one!!


Sam and Lauren are the same age until the 24th. It took Sam years to wrap her brain around the concept of being older...yet having a later birthday. The first 7 or so years of her life, she though I was scamming her. "How could Lauren's birthday possible be before mine, when I am older?" Now that she is a Wash U grad and a Certified Public Accountant...I think she's got it. I think????


The birthday seasons are beginning, Shannon will be 18 in November, Erin will be 20 in Dec, Ryan will be 13 in Jan and Kelsey will be 16 in Jan. Three big birthday's 13, 16 and 18...well according to Erin's ID....I think she may have already celebrated her 21st??????







Dave is currently on the Mo River completing a 340 mile race in a kayak...why do you ask??? Well, I'm not real sure. I talked to him this morning, he didn't sound too good. He should finish around 4 AM . I guess it would be rude if I asked him to take a cab home so I could sleep in??



Kelsey has a Cross Country Meet after school, Shannon is cheering at a volleyball game, Maggie has practice and Ryan is starring in the school play. I need to start a rent a parent program. I wonder if Dave could possibly pick up the pace a bit and paddle a tad bit faster...I could really use his help tonight.











I was greeted again this morning by a special surprise from Seamus in my bathroom. He loves to leave me little piles of love. Since I had my intestinal illness I insist that he is taunting me. He is purposely rubbing it in that his GI tract is A..OK. I was just not cut out to be the mother of a puppy mill animal. Children handcuffed to furniture...I can deal with that...Children wearing tight leopard print dresses...well OK that wasn't fun....but stepping in dog poop every morning?? that could make a girl crazy.

September came and went pretty quickly. Soccer season is always the busiest time for us. Throw in a little bout of diverticulitis along with a few homecomings along with a few soccer road trips and I am ready for a vacation. Oh wait...I had that in July. I actually get more rest when I go to work anyway.

Kelsey and Shannon still do not get along. Lauren gave Kelsey her old laptop and it is password protected. I know the password so I can use it, but she won't share it with her siblings especially Shannon.

They have figured it out a few times so she has had to change it. Her new password is ihateshannon. For those of you who aren't so quick, that is "I hate Shannon." I really enjoy the luxury of not having to go downstairs to use our home computer but....I feel like the worst mother in the world every time I type ihateshannon. What kind of mother does that?? The sad part is sometimes I am not too happy with Shannon when I type in the password. I'm thinking of talking to Kelsey to see if we can modify the password a bit. Shannonisoftentimescrabby, "Shannon is often times crabby" that would make me feel so much better as a parent.

Speaking of bad parenting, I kind of hit my breaking point last Thursday night. I have been burning the candle at both ends lately trying to catch up with work and fit in everything else in my schedule. I have been getting to work early every day to try and make up for all the follow up doctor visits that I have had since my illness. When I get home, I normally have about 7 minutes before I jump back in the car to drive the kids to whatever practice or game they have that evening. Thursday I had a little time to run 30 minutes on the treadmill before I had to pick Maggie up from soccer and then sit outside and freeze at her softball game. Dave took Ryan to practice then dropped him at home and went back to his office to catch up on some work. I was almost home around 9:30 when Kelsey called to let me know that I had to meet her at a gas station close to our house. She had a ride home from the "volunteer" activity that would take her to a gas station a few miles from our house. I already had my bathwater ran in my mind before the phone rang. I was so close to my evening ending.....


That is about the time that I lost it and poor little Maggie got the brunt of it. I went into my rant on how no one bothers to let the dog out and he just pees all over the house. The house was a wreck and I was exhausted. Everyone claims that the dog will not go outside for them. The dog is weird, I will give them that, but if they can't outsmart a puppy mill dog....we have bigger problems.

The dog is a little quirky like my husband. He can only go outside via the path between the recliner and the couch. God forbid we ever rearrange the furniture. If he is in the kitchen and you open the door...forget about it...you need to start in the living room. I have told them a million times, if he won't go out, put him on a leash. (the dog that is...not Dave)


Anyway...In the short car ride home to drop Maggie off, I let her know how I was fed up with their mess and the dog was going to the pound....or did I say I was going to "stab" the dog?? Tomato . Tomoto....

I also let Kelsey know by phone while I was waiting for her that she needed to pick some favorite activities because, come next week half of them would be going away. I think she was a little frightened to get in the car!!

When I got home the house was sparkling...little Maggie worked her little butt of during Operation Saving Seamus...I think she may have hid all the knives. Very rarely do I yell at Maggie, she has always been my easiest kid....boy was I missing the boat. I should probably write a parenting book!!!!!