Dave and I just got back from a charity event with the Blues hockey players. It was pretty cool to meet some of those guys. They were all so down to earth and nice. They probably thought we were rich and would be high bidders at the auction. Sorry we disappointed them, we were just there for the free food and drink. We got our tickets on a technicallity. Someone backed out at the last minute and a guy that deals with Dave through work called him last minute with extra tickets. I was talking to a friend of mine while I was getting ready. I mentioned that I was out of hairspray, she was so sweet, she brought me some. I had her take a few pictures of me and Dave before we left since we were so gussied up. I would post the pictures on the blog but for some reason my camera has deleted them and replaced them with some fat old people that I don't recognize. They even had on the same outfits as me and Dave. What a coincidence!!!!

I have a paper to write tonight for my computer class that is due tomorrow. I am pretty tired so I doubt my paper will be spectacular, I am just hoping I can stay awake long enough to write it. Lucky for me I drank water all night so at least I will be writing my paper sober.

Kelsey was home sick today. Erin came home from school with a migraine and Shannon stated she didn't feel good after dinner. Ryan went upstairs and feel asleep watching TV. Normally they stagger their bouts of sickness. Today I guess was just special, four out of the five kids that live here and aren't living in a dorm are sick and crabby. Oh how I miss the days they were just cuddly when they didn't feel good. Erin did however feel well enough to pull herself together to scrounge four dollars in change off of her father's dresser to get herself to the tanning spa.

They had an open house at school today, I had Dave go since his hours are more flexible. I told him he only needed to go in the primary building since Kelsey was sick and Shannon the big eighth grader would absolutely die if one of her parents actually showed up in her classroom. Dave called when he got to school to find out Ryan and Maggie's teacher's names and where their classrooms were. I thought about giving him a brief description of Ryan and Maggie just to make sure he was watching the right kids.

I gained a pound this week. I guess that little piece of Kelsey's birthday cake that turned into three pieces finally caught up to me. I did Tae Bo again tonight. Sometimes it feels like those DVD's are 4 hours long!!!

This weekend was actually pretty uneventful, not too much dysfunction, just the usual amount. We got to sleep in this morning since we went to mass last night. Our first game wasn't until 1:00 and the house was still clean from yesterday since Sam's friends came over. I could get used to living like this.

Erin had to work this morning. The guy she likes worked with her yesterday and again today. Just long enough for her to get her little hooks in him. I think his name is Zack. Zack if you come across my blog and are reading this, RUN!!!!!! Run for the hills, she's crazy!!! He texted her tonight, that sparked a 20 minute debate on whether or not she should text him back and if so, how long should she wait. She wants to appear calm cool and collected. I can't remember ever having that much confidence when I was her age. Good for her, she normally quits liking a boy once they like her back, that's good for me.

I cut Dave's hair tonight, it was looking pretty shabby. He has the father daughter banquet with Erin on Friday night. Dave's hairline seems to be receding at a pretty fast rate. Erin walked by while I was cutting his hair. She picked up some hair off the floor and sprinkled it on the top of his head. She said "Umm we are going to need this for Friday." We all laughed, poor Dave, we still love you, even if you are starting to look like Bruce Willis!!!!

Kelsey had a rough day at school on Friday. The little boy that likes Kelsey gave her a note at the end of the day that said "I am concentrating on soccer too, what a coincidence, we have so much in common." He is persistent, I'll give him that. She feels bad and wants to give him the sweatshirt back that he gave her. Shannon likes the sweatshirt, she will kill Kelsey if she gives it back.

Sam had a tournament at an indoor soccer place by our house. Her soccer team hung out at our house in between games. That meant we had to get up early to clean our house so all those girls didn't know what pigs we really are. I was in the kitchen making cookies for the girls, Dave told Shannon that she had to clean the powder room. She very pleasantly explained to her father that she couldn't get her cast wet so she couldn't. Dave told her that it would be OK because it was a right handed bathroom and he was confident that she will be just fine. I told her not to worry, I wanted it done right, I will clean it. Due to the nature of the toilet seat in the powder room, Ryan is no longer allowed to use that bathroom. As a matter a fact I may strip him from all toilet privileges in the house if he doesn't improve his aim. Luckily our house backs to the woods so the neighbors won't see him looking for a place to pee after I strip him from all his toilet privileges.

Maggie had her little speech tonight in church. She did really well. She sat a few rows up across the aisle from us in church. I looked at Shannon and said "look at your sister." She was sitting in her pew picking her nose. I think my 14 year old was ready to die right there in church. I was thinking about pulling my chap stick out of my purse and throwing it at her to stop her from digging for gold in church. Instead I just pretended like I didn't know her.

We dropped off the kids after mass and took grandma to dinner for her 70th birthday. The place we went to sings to you if it is your birthday and has you sit on a saddle while they sing. Grandma made sure to let us know she was not getting on the saddle. So much for her wild side.

Little Kelsey is twelve today. It is so hard to believe that my babies are all growing up so fast. A boy in her class has liked her for a long time. Today he made her a birthday card and asked her to be his girlfriend. It was really sweet, he even drew a soccer ball with an NC logo for North Carolina on it because he knows that is where she wants to go to college. She told him thanks but no thanks. She felt bad after school and wrote him a note explaining that she only liked him as a friend. She told him that she was too busy concentrating on soccer because she wants to make the National Team someday. I wonder if he is the first 12 year old to be shot down because someone is hoping to be on the National Team in 10 to 12 years. Where could she possibly find the time!!!!

Erin still hates me, I think Shannon likes me again for now. I left a blank signed check on the counter this morning for grandma to pick up an ice cream cake for Kelsey. Erin saw the check and took it for her sweat pants she wanted to order from school. Did she really think I would leave her a blank check?? After all I don't do anything for her!!!

Lauren is on a ski trip in Colorado, I am hoping she comes home with all her bones in tact. Of course if she does break a bone, I may urge her to leave it until she returns home so I can go visit that cute ER doc that we saw when Shannon broke her thumb. Maybe he will be working when I snap and strangle Erin.

Dave read my blog today and threw away the poinsettia's. Maybe he felt guilty for being a colossal jerk last night. I had a rotten night with our two teenage daughters and he strolled in late from work ready to kill someone because he had a bad day at the office. Of course he is the only person who could have possibly have had a bad day. After all I am such a lady of leisure, what could I possibly have to be crabby about.

Well it's official Erin hates me. I quote "I hate you, you do nothing for me, nothing." It all started because I asked her to address her own envelope for her rebate for the phone that she just bought. I'm sorry I thought addressing an envelope is a skill that a sixteen year old girl might find handy to have in her lifetime. It was really helpful that during our little squabble she brought the envelope to grandma and asked "grandma, will you address this for me, mom won't do anything for me, I hate her, I just hate her." Of course grandma quickly addressed the envelope to shut her up. I wonder if Erin could take me to court to have my parental rights stripped away since I was so hard on her and all. I can't for the life of me remember, but I'm sure I must have dropped her on her head as an infant. Shannon also decided at dinner that she hates me, she is mad because I don't think she should be roller skating on her field trip because she is in a cast for her broken thumb. So far tonight I am two for seven. I'm sure if I try hard enough I could probably get at least two more kids to hate me before bedtime.

Today was trash day. While I am happy that my husband actually remembered to wheel the cans to the curb, I am however amused that the poinsettia plants that I wanted to throw away two and a half weeks ago are still in my kitchen. Dave insisted I leave them in the kitchen until trash day. Oh, I get it, he meant trash day in March!! Notice the plant on the left is shrinking fast. Maybe I will get lucky and the dog will eat it. Sorry Maggie, I didn't mean it, I secretly love your dog that pees in my closet and all over my bathroom carpet.

Maggie got picked to speak at mass next Saturday to help kick off Catholic Schools Week. She has to say "hello, my name is Maggie Murphy and I like Assumption School because ______________." She wanted to say Art, I told her to think of something else and she said "lunch." We decided to go with "the teachers." I am thinking of skipping town before she turns fourteen. I decided that Shannon is not another Sybil like Erin, her personality doesn't quite fluctuate like Erin's does. She pretty much stays crabby and aggravated with me 24/7. When did I get so stupid??? My God, I don't even know which Jonas brother is the oldest. I should probably be shot!!

Dave just left to go get milk. He tried to talk me into going with him. I explained that I was going to skip "date night" at the grocery store tonight. It is just too painful now that I am on a diet. He has already called me with questions on what kind of cereal he should buy. Why can't he just make a decision without consulting me on cereal choices? We go through 5-7 boxes a week. If he makes a bad cereal choice it will be OK. Really, it's not life or death.

I feel a little bit like Rip Van Winkle. I have spent the last three days sleeping my life away. Sunday I stayed home while my family went to church. Maggie so selflessly offered to stay home to take care of mommy. Church has never been little Miss Mary Margaret's favorite place. I let her stay home with me while my family went to church. Ten minutes after they left, the neighbor called to see if Maggie could play. Apparently she was now going to take care of me from down the street.

Erin is happy for the moment, she cleaned out her checking account to buy herself a fancy new cell phone. I'm sure she will find something else that she can't live without by the time she gets her next paycheck. She had to go to the art museum for a class assignment. She called Dave in a panic because the gas tank in his car was on empty and she couldn't figure out how to get his gas cap off and it was as she says "like 2 degrees outside." He walked her through it, he asked her what the pump said and she said "do you want a car wash?" Dave asked her, "do you want a car wash?" She didn't think he was funny, how dare him let her use his car without filling the tank for the little princess.

Maggie had a birthday party to go to on Saturday, I completely forgot about it since I was in bed all weekend. I felt terrible, Erin felt sorry for her and decided to take her to McDonald's for a Happy Meal. She really can be a good big sister. (Of course she got the money from me to take her.)

The dog has not peed in the house all weekend. Dave thinks it is because I was home all weekend. For some reason that little dog adores me. Dave thinks he pees in my bathroom because he is mad at me for leaving. Does he not know that I can't stand him. I think the reason is more the fact that I was home to actually let him out to go potty. I need to train him to write a note on a brick that says "I have to go potty, please let me out!" and then train him to throw it at Dave and the kids when he is standing at the door waiting to go out.

Dave wanted to go to the History Museum today. The kids all kind of laughed at him when he asked who wanted to go with him. I would rather put a hot poker in my eye then go to the History Museum and I think my kids are just about as cultured as I am. He talked Ryan into going with him, he promised him that they would stop by a guitar store when they were finished.

Dave has just informed me that he is starting to feel sick. If he has what I had, we are all in trouble. I spent three days in bed, if he gets this we are looking at a month in bed along with bed sores and near death experiences.

I have spent the last two days at home sick in bed. I am all caught up on America's Next Top Model and HGTV home shows. I now feel ugly and my whole house is outdated. I found some old expired amoxicillin in the cabinet so I should feel better soon or maybe I will be worse from taking old expired medicine. I had pneumonia a few years ago and spent five days in the hospital. It was actually the best vacation I ever had. I had all of my meals brought to me on a tray and when I left, I didn't even have to take a new baby home like I did in all of my other hospital stays!!

I went grocery shopping after I picked the kids up from school. A nice lady noticed my overflowing cart and gave me a coupon from Shop and Save. She told me she noticed I had a full cart and thought the coupon would be helpful. I was at Dierbergs but she told me they accept competitors coupons. The coupon was, spend $50 and receive $10 off. The kids got six frozen pizza's this week instead of the normal 3 for ten that I usually buy, thanks to the kindness of a stranger. I picked up one of those rotisserie chickens tonight for dinner. I made mashed potatoes and corn and had bakery bread and butter. I also made two pizza's. I haven't made macaroni in two days!! I can't wait until the day that I only make one dinner. While we were eating dinner, Dave asked Erin about her little cooking incident yesterday. (he read about it on the blog) She explained to him what had happened. She failed to tell me yesterday that after she turned the stove on to boil the water for her oatmeal that she left to go tanning. God only knows how long that pot was actually on the stove. Erin has a party to go to on Saturday, she is a little upset that Shannon is spending the weekend with a friend and is planning on bringing "the" jeans with her. Not only that, Lauren brought all three pair of her Uggs back to college with her. She said, "all I have is tennis shoes, who wears tennis shoes with jeans??" I said, "Umm, I do." She said "I rest my case."

I picked the kids up from school today and we headed to a public school in our school district for Maggie's tutoring. She goes on Monday and Wednesday to get help with reading. This was the first time that I have been able to take her now that I have new hours at work. The kids are used to grandma taking them. She always takes them to get food at McDonald's or Taco Bell after she drops Maggie off. I didn't have any money and I gave Erin my credit card yesterday so she could get herself Subway for lunch. She conveniently forgot to give it back. Ryan tried to talk me into using my drivers license in the drive thru at McDonald's instead of a credit card. He told me he saw his father use his at Best Buy before. I explained that it is because he has a Best Buy credit card so they can look up his account by using his drivers license number. Erin called my phone in a panic while we were waiting for Maggie. She said "I need to talk to Shannon, it is an emergency." A radio station was giving away Jonas brother concert tickets and all you had to do is text the word Jonas to the radio station over and over again. Erin wanted Shannon to text using my phone while Erin did it using hers so they could double their odds. That sound like an emergency to me!!! Ryan was reading his book out loud and it was getting on Kelsey's nerves. I decided to leave Shannon and Kelsey in the van and I took Ryan in the school so we could study inside for his reading and religion test. Ryan didn't want to go inside, he was afraid someone might think that he was going inside for tutoring. Heaven forbid, no Ryan you need a tutor for tooth brushing and shoe tying. Your reading is just fine.

When I got home I noticed a funny smell. I looked at the stove and noticed that the burner was bright red. I asked Erin what she was cooking. She was upstairs texting like a mad woman. She said "Oh my gosh , I forgot, I was going to make oatmeal. The water had all boiled away and my pot was black. It is a good thing she didn't burn the house down while attempting to win Jonas Brother tickets. Shannon has a pet fish named Juicy Jonas, it is a combination of Juicy Couture, and the Jonas brothers. That would have been terrible if Juicy Jonas would have died in a house fire because Erin was trying to win concert tickets for his namesake.

I had to run to Wall Mart to buy more Tae Bo DVD's tonight. My skinny daughter brought hers back to college with her yesterday. She asked me the other day if I would be interested in buying her lap top from her. She wants to sell it to buy a Mac. Hmm let me think about that, do I want to buy the lap top that I bought her as a graduation gift. I am still paying on it on my Circuit City account, yeah, that's a good idea, I'll pay for it twice. No wonder I never have any money. Maybe if the Tae Bo tapes work and I lose enough weight I can buy back the sweater I bought her for Christmas when she gets tired of it.

My mother was a little disappointed in my blog yesterday. Apparently she doesn't see my son's talent as clearly as his mother does. I will try to be funny today to make up for yesterday's post.

I have changed my hours at work starting this week. I had a meeting with my boss on Monday. She wanted me to come back and work full time. I had a few conditions, the main one was that I wanted to get off every day at 2:30 so I could be home with the kids. I am taking one class at school in the evening and two online classes instead of going to school two days a week. After she agreed to my new hours I said, "With that said, can I have tomorrow off to take Shannon to the doctor for her thumb?" She laughed and said "of course."

When I called the doctor that the ER gave me, they couldn't get her until next week. I called around and found a doctor that happened to be a hand specialist and his office was two blocks from Shannon's school. We got there today and they took more X-Rays. The X-ray machine was not quite as state of the art as what they had at the hospital. When the technician touched the foot pedal to lower the table, the pedal fell off. I thought to myself "this is not good." The doctor came in the room and said, "what did they tell you at the hospital?" We told him an he responded, "the x-ray came back negative for a fracture." I told him that the Er doctor told me that he had a hard time seeing it, but he blew it up on the computer screen and showed us, the fracture was right on the knuckle. The doctor took off her temporary cast, her thumb was still swollen and green. He said he just glanced at the X-ray and he wanted to take another look. He came back in and said , "the fracture is right next to the growth plate, it was hard to read, due to the X-Ray and the amount of swelling and bruising, I believe that it is indeed broken." He sent the nurse in to put on a cast and told us to come back in two weeks. I haven't mentioned this to Shannon but I think when I come back in two weeks her thumb might be on backwards. I 'm not too confident in this doctor, considering I practically had to put a red X on the X-ray to show him where it was broken. On a positive note, it was a quick visit, her appointment was at 10:30, I had her back at school by noon and that included a trip to McDonald's. How important is a thumb anyway? She has another one!!

I picked the kids up from school at 3:00 and hurried off to my school for my computer class that started tonight, the class is from 4:00 to 5:50. I got there and the halls were empty. I took out my schedule and noticed that I was a week early. What a dork I am. I did all that rushing around and I wasn't even supposed to be there. I came home and cooked dinner for my family. I actually got four of my kids to eat and I wasn't even serving macaroni and cheese tonight. Miracles really do happen.

My darling husband so eloquently pointed out that I left the jingle bells hanging on the front door when I took down the Christmas decorations. Now that he has finally put the Christmas tree away he feels it is safe to give me trouble about the jingle bells. The girls bathroom light is burned out again, I could wager a pretty safe bet that the jingle bells will be packed away before the lights are replaced in the bathroom. Not to mention the two poinsettia plants in my kitchen that I wanted to throw away Sunday when we were cleaning. He insisted that I leave them until Tuesday and he would get them out with the trash. Guess what is still in my kitchen??

I just got home after a long day so I am going to post the story that Ryan wrote for school. I promised him that I would post it on my blog. I thought he did pretty well for third grade. He is much better at writing stories then he is at making Christmas ornaments.

Ryan Murphy
1-10-08

Banana Split


Once Upon a time there was a wooly mammoth named Charlie, he had brown hair with big tusks. Charlie was kind of a leader. There was a monkey named Fred who had brown hair and he loved to eat bananas. Fred was kind of a slacker.

One day they were walking in the forest and they hit something. It was a tall ape; he was guarding the castle of King Donkey. The ape said in a grouchy voice, “Did you pay your taxes?”
“How much” said Fred? 1000 donkey coins said the ape. What!!! Exclaimed Fred, Charlie said, “This is all we have.” Holding up ten donkey coins. Aww, you don’t have the money said the ape. Then follow me, your going to prison. Charlie and Fred both said “WHAT”!! While the ape handcuffed them, he said “prison is where you have to do work filing King Donkey’s paperwork and making him delicious pies.”

Meanwhile, they were in prison. Fred said “we have to get out of here.” Charlie got out some giant toe nail clippers and started clipping away at his tusks. Fred asked him “What are you doing?” Charlie said, “Be quiet Fred, I have a plan.” Charlie used the pieces of his tusk to file away at the bars. Bingo they were free. A bird came along and Fred said, “Do you want to join the club? “We get jackets.” The birds name was patch. He said “I know where the donkey’s room is.” The ape was running after them so they started running faster. Fred jumped on top of Charlie’s back.Yee ha said Fred, the ape was running faster, Fred cried, “ride em cowboy” and slapped Charlie’s thigh. Charlie hit a dead end, a brick wall. Fred said “a secret passage way works for me.

There was a huge pit of boiling lava on the other side of the wall. The bird flew across; Fred swung from a vine to make it across. Charlie was too big. He found a piece of wood shaped like a surf board. He surfed his way across. They found a huge rope. Patch said, I think we are supposed to climb this. Fred stepped on his banana; it squished on the wall and made banana steps so they could climb up the wall. When they got to the top the ape was there. I will take him, said Fred. Monkey vs. Ape. The ape flipped Fred through the air. Fred shook his head got back up and squirted two bananas in the ape’s eyes, and then he kicked him in the face.

They came to a huge door with a huge lock. “We don’t have the key,” said Charlie. “No, but the ape does,” said Fred. They ran back and got the key and opened the door. There was no Donkey King inside but they found all the tax money. They returned to their village and returned everyone’s money. And they all lived happily ever after.


The End

We had a busy weekend. Shannon had her championship tournament game for basketball. She blocked a pass in the last minute of the first quarter. It caught her thumb and she sat on the bench with ice on it for the rest of the game. I was sitting on the bleachers thinking, toughen up, put the ice down and get back in the game. We ended up losing pretty bad. She showed me her thumb when the game was over and it was pretty swollen. Thank God I didn't actually tell her to toughen up. We went to the emergency room after the game. I had Maggie and Kelsey with me. The doctor came in and I think my heart skipped a beat. Dave who??? He was talking to me about Shannon's injury and he was so darn cute, he could have told me we were going to have to amputate and I probably would have said OK. The nurse asked if she had taken anything for pain and I told her no because no one had any infant liquid ibuprofen in their purse at the eighth grade basketball tournament. Heaven forbid she actually learn how to swallow a pill. The nurse took us down to X-ray and Maggie was searching her body for old injuries. Shannon was getting too much attention. She came up with "My head hurts, I bumped it on the wall a long time ago," (Nice try Maggie, sit down and be quiet.)The doctor came back in a while later and told us her thumb was broken. He put a temporary cast on it and we need to see an orthopedic surgeon on Tuesday. It was helpful that Kelsey was with us and made sure to point out to Shannon that it was probably the last basketball game she will ever play in her whole life. Thanks Kelsey, if I ever need someone to rub salt in the wounds again, I have my man!!!!! I called Lauren and told her what happened, she was out to dinner with Mike. A few minutes later she called back and said, "Mike wants to know if she can still hold a microphone?" Shannon said "don't worry, I already thought of that, it is my left thumb, I should be just fine."

Erin is working tonight. She noticed on the schedule on Friday that the cute boy was refereeing some games on Sunday morning. She decided to ask her manager if they needed any extra help on Sunday? Her brilliant plan backfired, he said "sure Erin that would be great, we need someone to work 5-9. " Now she is stuck working the opposite shift as the cute guy. How is he supposed to know he is her boyfriend when he still doesn't even know that she exists?

Erin left yesterday to go tanning. Shortly after she left she called me and said "I think I ran over a red and blue water balloon in the driveway." I said, "We don't normally have water balloons laying in the driveway in January." I sent Ryan outside to check. He found the bottle of Tide that grandma got out of the trunk and set behind the car. She asked Ryan to carry it in for her. I told Erin that when she got home she had to clean up the driveway with the dirty clothes. We don't want to let all that laundry detergent go to waste. The hose wasn't hooked up anymore since it is January. I decided to leave this special little project for Dave. My mother was a little concerned. She was afraid he would get out of his car and slip and fall in the driveway. I told her he was a big boy and that I was sure he would be just fine. She insisted that I call and warn him, she was afraid that he would fall and be in a coma. She has spent half of her life waiting for the sky to fall and the other half worrying about it. When I called Dave his only question was, "did it get on my grass?" I swear sometimes I think he loves his lawn more than his family. Luckily the grass was free and clear of tide. The nozzle on our hose was broken so poor Dave had to hold his thumb over the hose to get good water pressure. By the time that he finished, his thumb was numb from the cold. We have the most mountain fresh, squeaky clean driveway on the block.

The tree is boxed up and in the attic!!!! I think he felt guilty for kicking me in my sleep last night. He said I was snoring really loud. He kept kicking me to try and shut me up. I got up to go to the bathroom, he was afraid that I would remember that I was awake because of the constant kicking by my loving spouse so he pretended to be asleep when I got back in bed. He said he is going to buy me some breathe right strips. He really spoils me, I am so lucky!!!

Yes, I know it is January 9th. I think the Christmas tree and ladder look fabulous in my great room. I am going to try a new angle. Honey if you are reading my blog, please leave the tree up for at least another week.

Erin got a call from her boss on Monday, he was short handed and needed someone to work. She works the concession stand at an indoor soccer place. He asked her if she wouldn't mind making the next weeks schedule for him. She couldn't wait to get to work. She had planned to schedule the cute boy (that doesn't know she exists yet) with her every night that she worked. WHAT A COINCIDENCE!! Unfortunately for her when she got to work he changed his mind and said "don't worry about the schedule I took care of it." Darn, she won't have to weasel Shannon out of those jeans this weekend after all.

Erin called me at work around 4:00. She said "where is everyone? All of the cars are gone and no one is home." I asked her what difference did it make. She said,"I don't have a car and I need to go tanning, my sophomore dance is coming up." I said, "don't you think it would be a good idea to find a date before you worry about your tan?" She said "I am bringing my boyfriend from work, he just doesn't know that he is my boyfriend yet."

The Toyota got picked up today. I donated it to goodwill. They told me to leave the keys in it. My mother was a little worried that someone might steal it. I figured since the car no longer goes above 30 mph I was pretty safe. Before I donated it I called a number that advertised cash for junk cars, they offered me $140. I decided to take the tax deduction. All that I have left of that little car is the huge oil stain in the front of the house. I think the neighbors may throw a party now that I have the oil gusher out of the neighborhood. The jokes on them, my van has an oil leak too!!!

I have reached day 9 of my diet. So far so good. I lost two pounds. WOO HOO, I am ready to eat a small child and all I have to show for it is two lousy pounds. I guess it is better then gaining. Dave and Kelsey ran three miles Monday night. She beat him by five minutes. Tonight he challenged her to a rematch. He took a five minute head start and told her to try and catch him. He beat her by less than a minute. I am sure she will get him tomorrow. I would have to take a 40 minute head start, and she would probably still beat me.

My tree is still up and my neatly boxed Nativity set is in the middle of my kitchen. I am going to turn over a new leaf and exercise a little patience, just like I did when he left the skeleton hanging on the hook on our front porch until Thanksgiving.

Today was the start of the kids first full week back at school. I should have gotten up a little earlier. I spent half my morning writing out checks for, lunch money, field trips, yearbooks and Erin's carpool. Maggie said she didn't need money because she has a credit card at school. She doesn't realize that I send money in so she has money on her lunch card. She will be Visa's best customer someday.

I looked over Ryan's homework after he went to bed. I didn't realize that he learned to write in Chinese. My boy is so advanced. He did a math worksheet and it was so sloppy, I hardly recognized one number. I believed I asked him to write his spelling words at least three times while I was making dinner. He somehow dodged that task without me noticing until he was fast asleep. He was however, successful at guitar hero this evening. Dave asked him if he got any TR's today. TR's (I'm not sure what it stands for) are like a demerit. If you get four you get detention and for each TR you lose your recess. Ryan said he had a sub today, lucky him, she probably doesn't even know what a TR is. If she comes back tomorrow I hope she knows how to read Chinese so she can grade my oh so gifted son's math worksheet.

Maggie smuggled three baby dolls in her backpack to school today. I didn't even notice her backpack bulging at the seems, I guess I was too busy writing checks. After school she told Shannon that she accidentally put them in her backpack. I am going to start frisking her in the morning. Ryan left his folder with his Chinese homework on the kitchen table. I told Lauren that I could probably bet the house that he will get in the van tomorrow without getting his folder off the table.

It was hard getting up this morning because we stayed out so late last night. Dave took Shannon to her basketball game and I took Kelsey. I decided to take all of my Christmas decorations down today. I got most of the ornaments off of the tree and had Dave get me a ladder for the high ones. Our tree is twelve feet tall. I asked Dave to get the box for our big Nativity set out of the attic in the garage. I think he may have thought that I said,"honey at your convenience, after you watch an hour of the soccer channel, will you please get me the box down that I can't reach?"After all I asked for the ladder about an hour before he brought it inside. Once again we shared a few pleasantries and he got the box down. A while later I asked him to carry the storage boxes down stairs for me. Here we go again, I think he thought I meant after the whole family trips over them for a day or two. He was playing as a sub tonight for his sisters bowling league, he said that he just wanted to relax and watch a little TV before he had to leave to bowl. I very "gently" explained that a father of seven has given up his right to relax by the time that he is a father of five. He did finally carry my storage boxes downstairs but my naked tree is still staring at me from the corner of the great room. No hurry honey, I don't want to cut into your relaxing time!! Oh and I will get the trash that is overflowing that you walked past on your way out the door.

We had three basketball games this morning and then we actually had date night. Not the usual date to the grocery store but an actual date. Dave got Blues hockey tickets from work. I haven't been to a hockey game in probably fifteen years. Whenever we got tickets, Dave would take one of the girls. We went to dinner first and then the game. We had club seats where you get free food and drinks all night. Dave who very rarely drinks had four beers and I had two hot chocolates. We left the hockey game around eleven. I was driving and Dave was navigating. We drove around the scenic route for a while in the absolute worst neighborhoods in the city of St. Louis. That was fun. Once we got on the highway Dave told me we needed to stop at a gas station soon so he could pee. Yet again, we pick another bad neighborhood.

Dave talked me into going to the casino. I haven't been there in probably five years. I ended up winning a little over 100 dollars. By the time we were done we were down $15 between the two of us. We were getting tired and decided to leave. We couldn't believe that it was 2:00 in the morning. Not bad for two almost forty year olds who are normally asleep by 10:30. Dave suddenly felt the urge to poop once we got in the parking lot. He kept yelling at me to drive faster, he was afraid he wouldn't make it to the nearest gas station. I'm sorry but I don't feel like pulling out of the casino parking garage going 70mph. We exchanged a few pleasantries in the car on the way to the nearest gas station. The closest gas station didn't have a bathroom that didn't require getting a key from an attendant, their was a waffle house next door, he told me to go there. I dropped him off and contemplated leaving him there with the rest of the drunks. He finally came out and we headed for home. Yet again he complained that I wasn't driving fast enough because his stomach was upset. Had this been a real date I doubt I would go out with this impatient,hostile, diarrhea boy again.

I get off work early on Friday's. It is always a treat for me to be able to watch Dr. Phil and Oprah. When I got home I noticed that the kids couldn't find the time to put their bowls in the sink from breakfast. God love them, they must have been tired. The kids were nowhere to be found but all the lights and TV were on. I started scrolling down the TV channels to move from Nickelodeon to NBC when my son came in the back door. As soon as I saw him my jaw dropped. His new jeans were soaking wet from the knee down and he was covered in mud. I said "Oh my God, what were you thinking?" He turned around and said "Umm mom, I have a problem." His hand was covered in blood. He was playing in the creek with his buddies and cut his thumb on a piece of glass. I brought him in my bathroom to clean out his thumb. I was afraid to apply pressure because I wasn't sure if there was any glass stuck in his thumb. I tried to call his doctor and it just rang and rang. I guess they forgot to turn their answering machine on with the number for the exchange. I cleaned him up as best as I could and brought him to urgent care. They cleaned it out really well and sent us on our way. I can't wait to get that bill. I think I liked it better when he played with barbies. (even though he ripped their heads off) So far being nine has been a bust. Shannon had a basketball game tonight. She jammed her finger in the third period and it is swollen, I am not going back to urgent care for at least a week. I am becoming a regular. She has two more games this weekend. Kelsey has her first game tomorrow morning. Shannon had to borrow a uniform tonight from her friends little sister. They had uniform pick up on Wednesday night, the coach called but Lauren gave me the message on Thursday. That was helpful!!

As promised, here is the picture of the hot pink room. They were going to paint the closet neon green. They painted the trim around their full length mirror with the green and came to their senses that the color was a little too wild. I can't bring myself to take a picture of the neon green mirror hanging on the hot pink wall.

I was off work today. I had Dave drop the kids off at school and I went back to bed. I can't even begin to tell you how much I enjoyed my morning. I put the dog in his crate so I wouldn't have to listen to him gnaw on his leg in my bed while I tried to sleep like he normally does. I went grocery shopping to buy food for my new diet. It is expensive trying to be skinny. I bought Ryan a strawberry cake mix so I wouldn't be tempted to eat it. His favorite ice cream and milk shakes is strawberry so I figured he would like the cake and I would stay away because I hate strawberry. When it was time to sing happy birthday he was pouting because he couldn't figure out his Rubik's cube. We were done with the song and were waiting for him to blow out his candles. He said "I wasn't ready, I don't have a wish." Erin chose this time to point out to him that he had a pink cake with pink icing and pink candles. That went over really well, I think his wish turned into, I wish I had six brothers instead of six sisters. The candles melted to half their size before he finally blew out his candles.

Erin and Shannon got their room put back together. I never thought I hated the color pink until today. I like bright colors but I have to say this is a little extreme. I will post a picture soon. I am too exhausted from doing Tae Bo with Lauren and Kelsey and I don't have the energy to climb the stairs tonight to snap a picture. Kelsey barely broke a sweat.(maybe she could take the picture)

Ryan's birthday is tomorrow. It is hard to believe that nine years ago tonight I was headed to the hospital in the middle of a horrible snow storm to deliver an 8lb bouncing baby boy. Of course had he decided to come on time, I could have avoided the snow storm and gotten an extra tax deduction. I guess I have enough of those anyway. Dave and I went shopping tonight for Ryan's birthday present. We got him a new bike. We debated between that and a shoe tying course. Grandma bought him heelies for his birthday. He wants to know if he can wear them to school. Like he doesn't get in enough trouble at school already. Lets just add roller skating down the hallway to the list. The kids all head back to school tomorrow. The house will be nice and quiet. I might even get a chance to play Wii. By three o clock I should be an expert.

Kelsey had her training session today with Lori Chalupny. She has been pretty excited all week. It was amazing that she would take the time to train with Kelsey, especially on such a miserably cold day. I got out of the car a couple of times to snap a few pictures. I lasted about two minutes and then got back in my warm car. Kelsey will remember this experience for a long time. It was pretty cool!!

Dave is painting Erin and Shannon's room. He took them to Home Depot and he said they picked out three of the ugliest colors in the whole store. We have hot pink and I mean "hot", neon pink and I mean "neon" and lime green, do I have to say it? I mean "lime." The green is for the closet and the pinks are for the walls. I asked him when he was going to paint my kitchen. I could tell by the look that he gave me that it wouldn't be anytime soon. He painted Ryan's room after we moved in and vowed that he would never paint another room in this house again. The girls finally wore him down. He put some paint swatches and a paint brush in their Christmas stockings. Erin got it right away, Shannon was a little confused as to why she got a paint brush for Christmas. She probably thought she could use it as a microphone to give her hairbrush a break.

I started my diet today. I did Tae Bo when Dave took the girls to Home Depot. Fifteen minutes in, I got a little nervous. I was afraid I may collapse and no one was home to revive me. I made it through the DVD in on piece. (one very large piece) We will see how tomorrow goes. I used to do Tae Bo every day after I had Ryan. I was nine years younger back then. It is so much easier to sit on the couch watching biggest loser then actually exercising. I prefer to watch. I have always been more of a spectator.